Tell's talk
Tell's memories of his friend Brant! I’m grateful as all of us are to have been blessed to know and to associate with Brant Morrow.
Let me begin by expressing on behalf of Andrea and all of Brant’s family their deepest and most sincere appreciation for your thoughtfulness, your kindness and your willingness to bare no only one an other's burdens but more specifically her family’s burdens by attending today. For me it is truly an Honor to speak… To give perspective I spoke at my father's funeral, my grandfathers funeral, and my father-in-laws funeral and I will tell you that to speak today is by far the most difficult, the most gut-wrenching and the most complex for me...but at the same time the most gratifying. I hope that my remarks might be fitting and rise to the level that this occasion and my friend Brant deserves.
I speak today having a very unique perspective on Brant’s life and with that perspective I have been able to draw insights into who exactly Brant Morrow is at his core. I hope tha t by sharing my insights with you on who Brant is to me that you might gain a deeper appreciation for Brant and the man that he became.
We gather here today each having a different relationship to Brant. To some he is a son, to some he is a brother, to some he is an uncle, to some he is a nephew, to some he is a cousin, to some he is a classmate, to some he is a teacher, to some he is a student, to some he is a colleague to some he is a co-worker, to some he is a patient, and to some they are his patient, to some he is a fellow ward member, to some he is a home teacher, to some he is a mission companion,….to some hi is simply dad, and to one here today he is a husband and he is an eternal companion, but of all of these relationships which he forged while on this earth the only one which I share with him is the one that we all share with him….he is my friend.
I came to know Brant as a senior in High school at Mountain View. My earliest recollection of him was playing hacky sack next to the senior locker cage. He was wearing a bright orange shirt, a backpack over one shoulder and hiking boots. He had bleached hair and I distinctly remember think to myself, “Who is this guy?” What a question...a question that would be answered over the next twenty years as he and I became close friends. Our lives became very closely aligned as we participate in many of the same activities and had the same close group of friends. We attended EFY together, graduate high school at the same time and I watched as he and our friends one b one left for missions. He was there when I returned home from my mission. We lived together as room-mates in three different houses for about 3 years. I have seen Brant in some of his most unflattering moments and at the same time I have seen his character and his heart shine forth and reveal his best. When I consider my friendship with Brant and how I would describe him as a friend only one specific and distinct title come to mind, “The Driver.” Let me elaborate.
Many of the most moving important experiences I can remember of Brant happened while he was in the driver’s seat. I’m not sure how that dynamic came to be but I’m pretty sure it was just his nature to assume that position.
One such experience came when Brant and I lived at Tyson Ripley’s house across from Poston Junior High. One night after sneaking into Poston Pool and then over-indulging in chips and salsa, I woke at about 2:00a.m to the worst stomach ache I had ever experienced. I heard the sound of Cartoon Network (Brant’s favorite channel) blaring on the living room TV and I got up to shut it off. I found Brant in his usual position sleeping on the couch in his swimming suit with his mouth wide open. As I shut off the TV he instantly awoke and said, “Hey, I was watching that.” He then came to his senses and asked what I was doing up. After explaining what I was feeling and after him seeing my pain he jumped up, grabbed his keys and said, “Let’s go...If it’s appendicitis, you can’t wait. Let’s get you to the ER.” Without even putting on shoes, he helped me into his red Jetta. He stopped by my parents house, banged on the front door and told my Dad to jump in.
It was a busy night in the ER...I had been waiting to be seen for over an hour and I was really suffering. Brant looked at me then looked at my Dad and said, “He needs a blessing…” Brant and my father laid hands on my head and pronounced the blessing. Immediately following, Brant looked up an said to my dad, “Steve, loam me five bucks. I’m going to get some Pepto.” Five minutes later, I drank half the bottle. Five minutes after that, my pain went away and I walked out of the ER. Brant dropped my Dad off, and tired and slightly embarrassed, Brant drove me home. He was the Driver.
Fast forward a couple years...Brant and I were living at Corey Lucas’s house. I was dating a cert ain girl who is now my wife and her birthday was coming up and I had no plan but I was desperate to impress her. After discussing my situation with Brant, he said to me, “Don’t worry. I’ve got a great idea...we’ll kid-nap her…” to which I responded “Perfect!” (I was desperate.) He said, “Tell her you’ll pick her up for dinner at 7:00 p.m. with a big smile on his face. That afternoon Brant pulled into the driveway driving a school bus that he borrowed/stole from Corey Lucas’s car lot. It was a short bus. I shook my head and thought, “Perfect.” (remember I was desperate.) We picked up a bus full of friends, including Fuzz, Michelle, and Andrea then picked up Jackie. WE blindfolded her and took her to the thrift store on Main Street to buy her a new outfit, including a nasty purple dress, an ugly red belt and a Tiara that she would wear to dinner. It was a memorable birthday. And Brant was the Driver.
Fast forward a few more years, as a newly-wed in dental school, I saw a beat up old fishing boat for sale on the side of the road. It was in bad shape but the price was right. I later found out that when you live in an apartment complex and you have no vehicle to tow a boat or even know how to drive a boat, the price is never right. Regardless, after explaining to Brant that I had purchased a boat and explained my situation, he said with absolute confidence, “No worries, you can keep it at my house and we can restore it together.” We spent the next few months sanding, painting, replacing the floor, replacing the carpet, installing new sea ts, fixing the steering, and repairing the engine. Finally it was time to take it out on the lake. WE hitched it up to Brant’s white Toyota pick-up truck and he drove us to Saguaro Lake. When we got there he asked , “Do you want to back up the truck or drive the boat.” Brant was the Driver!
Fast Forward a couple more years. After finishing dental school, I took a job in Waco, Texas where I now live. It came time to pack up my little family with two small children and make the move to start the next chapter in my life. On a hot August day with temperature hovering around 115 degrees, Brant reluctantly came and helped us load the U-haul truck. Now moving is never fun and especially when it’s 115 degrees but Brant wasn’t reluctant because of the heat or the heavy lifting, he was sad to see a friend move away and I could feel it. Nevertheless, the next morning, he came over, helped me attach the tow dolly to the back of the truck. We loaded my Honda Civic on to it and then he proceeded to climb up into the driver’s seat of the U-haul.
He said, “I’ll drive the first leg, when I get tired, I’ll switch with you.” For the next 2 days and 1000 miles, Brant never got tired and I didn’t end up driving a single mile. When we pulled into Waco, we worked through the evening to unload the truck. He slept on our couch and was up at 6:00 a.m. the next morning to catch a flight back to Phoenix. When it came to helping my family move across the country, Brant was the driver!
For me, Brant has always been the driver...and as I reflect upon this idea, I have come to realize that those instances when he was the driver, are the moments when he was offering service. I’m sure all of you here can think of a time or situation where Brant was the driver for you, helping you, making sure you made it there safely, lifting you up encouraging you or giving you sage advice which he was always willing to do. Serving others was jus t part of who Brant is.
The great heavy weight boxing champion Muhammad Ali once said:
“Service is the rent you pay for your room here on earth.”
According to this standard, Brant’s rent bill has been paid in full and then some.
During Brant’s life, he was no stranger to hardships, trials, and adversity. It seem that cancer met him at every turn and was a persistent, relentless, and enduring reality that sought to engulf him and overtake him. Starting with Tati as a baby and then to Brant, next to Andrea and finally to Freddy. Every diagnosis seemed to compound and weight upon him. Brant shouldered the burden. He seemed at times indifferent to his own plight. I worried about him as we all did. On one occasion while he and his family were visiting us in Texas, Brant and I took all the kids down to the river to wade around and hunt crawdads. After a while, I noticed Brant a little way off sitting under a treee escaping the sun, which became his constant enemy after losing all of his pigment due to the chemotherapy. He seem sullen and pensive. I sat down and asked how he was holding up. He broke down just a little...(I know it was a miracle Brant showed emotion) he shared with me that his biggest fear was letting is family down; he worried that he may not be strong enough to endure. He told me, “I have come to terms with the fact that I have no control over how long I will be here….but I’m still here now and that’s all I’m going to worry about. That’s how I cope with things.” How a person can go through what Brant went through and still have a good perspective on life escapes me. How a person can be diagnosed with cancer, go through chemo and have 3 brain tumors removed during PA school and still graduate is incredible and all this while maintaining his family.
We sometimes see others who are passing through tribulation or struggles and wonder why must it be so hard for them? Why do some seem over afflicted with adversity and given such a heavy load to bare. The following poem by Douglas Malloch offers us perspective.
Good Timber
The tree that never had to fight
For sun and sky and air and light,
But stood out in the open plain
And always got its share of rain,
Never became a forest king
But lived and died a scrubby thing.
The man who never had to toil
To gain and farm his patch of soil,
Who never had to win his share
Of sun and sky and light and air,
Never became a manly man
But lived and died as he began.
Good timber does not grow with ease,
The stronger wind, the stronger trees,
The further sky, the greater length,
The more the storm, the more the strength.
By sun and cold, by rain and snow,
In trees and men good timbers grow.
Where thickest lies the forest growth
We find the patriarchs of both.
And they hold counsel with the stars
Whose broken branches show the scars
Of many winds and much of strife.
This is the common law of life.
Brant Morrow is good Timber!
Calm and confident, comforting and consoling, Brant was the guy you wanted around when things were hard. Funny witty, beyond sarcastic and always ready for fun, Brant was also the guy you wanted to have around when thing were good.
I’m grateful as all of us are to have been blessed to know and to associate with Brant Morrow.
Let me speak now of his legacy. His legacy begins with his upbringing. Son of a police officer and a school teacher, Stan and Mary instilled in Brant vital qualities like hard work, moral decency, honesty and treat your fellow man with honor and respect. These qualities have now been passed on to Brant’s children...Tati, Hailey Levi and Naomi; you four are some of the best kids I know. At this time in your lives you have been given a new challenge. One that in this moment might seem too difficult to bare. However r before you begin to doubt yourselves or sell yourselves short, let me remind you of who you are. You are Brant Morrow’s daughters and you are Brant Morrow’s son, and he has instilled in you all of who he is and as you grow and continue to come to understand who you are, you will someday pass on the good qualities that our dad lived and that will form his legacy.
President Russel M. Nelson president of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints has said:
Today we have a little more time to bless others—time to be kinder, more compassionate, quicker to thank and slower to scold, more generous in sharing, more gracious in caring.
Then when our turn comes to pass through the doors of death, we can say as did Paul: “The time of my departure is at hand. I have fought a good fight, I have finished my course, I have kept the faith.”
Brant fought the good fight. Brant finished his course. Brant kept the faith.
My prayer for Andrea, Tati, Hailey, Levi and Naomi is the same prayer that my five year old son offered before he went to be a few days ago. He prayed:
“Bless Levi that he could have a kind home, full of happiness and joy…
In the name of Jesus Christ, Amen.
Brants Funeral Bio by sisters
Letter to their late brother.
Tiffini and Tina’s Letter to Brant: 12-26-77 to 11-24-2021
Memorial 12-3-2021
Dear Brant,
Remember when you made our debut into this world on December 26th, as an early arrival in 1977, much to your mother’s surprise. Brant you always did like to startle Mom, much to her chagrin. You were a quiet and observing baby, a trait you would carry throughout your life.
As a very little boy, you would follow your sibling around and you loved to be outside with them. Your love of outdoors began to flourish even at that young toddler age. You would continue to build memories in the outdoors with those you loved; it was a place of peace for you.
When we were kids, you wanted me to come outside and play with you by throwing a football around. I wasn’t too interested because I could not understand how to throw such an awkwardly shaped ball, but you really wanted to play catch, so you said you would teach me how to throw the football. You carefully instructed me on how to hold the ball with my fingers going through the threads and that when I released it, I had to put a spin on it. You were so patient and we did play catch many times after that! As a matter of fact, Brant, you taught me how to shoot a basketball with correct form, dribble a soccer ball with the inside of my foot, and pop a wheelie on my bicycle.
In elementary school, Brant, you and I would walk to school, rather I would walk, and you loved to ride your bike. For you, it was an adventure to ride to school every day. There was a church on the way to school that had a rocky berm alongside the parking lot. Brant, you loved to take your bike up the side of the berm and ride it down to get a good crash in before the bottom. I always expressed concern and worry that you were really going to crash sometime and get really hurt. You always laughed and said that was what you were trying to do. I do remember you had quite a few scrapes from those adventures.
As kids we were often in trouble together for arguing about some thing or another and we were usually sent to our rooms, but our rooms were so close that inevitably we would end up laughing about being in our rooms right next to each other and we would go back to playing.
One of our favorite things to do when we were kids, was to go camping at Canyon Creek. It was a kid’s dream. I remember that you loved playing capture the flag in a deep ravine nearby. We would go to the fish hatchery, play in the creek, catch water snakes, and go rock hopping. It was an all-around favorite activity and it probably contributed to you desire to make memories outdoors with those you love.
As kids, Brant, you and Jarel used to stay up late at night and set up forts in your side by side bunkbeds and play dodgeball. Also, you were so smart that you would memorized all of Jarel’s friend’s phone numbers just by hearing them once. It made him so mad that you knew all his friends’ phone numbers before he did.
Remember when you were in Junior High, Mom purchased a Serger sewing machine, and it was pretty complex to thread, but Brant, you asked if you could thread it, and try it, Mom said, “sure” and that was all you needed. You figured out how it worked and made yourself a pair of NBA (probably the Phoenix Suns) themed boxer shorts, which were kind of the cool thing to have at that time. But Brant, you were always looking out for others. AT school, a boy was wearing a pair of cut-off shorts for PE. The coach yelled at him and told him to hem them. He tried but the shorts looked worse than before. Brant, you told the boy that you would do it and without asking for any help, you hemmed them and took them back to school for the boy.
Brant, you are artistic. I wish I could’ve seen this side of you more often. In high school you took a jewelry making class and your teacher would often let you come in during off hours to work on things because you were quite talented.
One of my favorite things to do with you was to hang out and talk. They say in conversation you should avoid religion and politics, but you loved to talk about everything! When we were younger, you loved to debate which sometimes drove me crazy but as we matured, I realized that you had a keen interest in pursuing truth. You wanted to know what truth was and how to obtain it. It made for some interesting conversation as we became adults.
Remember when our parents let us drive overnight to Utah to go to EFY? That was an interesting adventure! It was me and you, with all your friends. I did not fit in, but you were always adamant that I come and be a part of things.
Brant, you always wanted others to feel a part of things. When you were a priest, you extended an invitation to one of the boys in your quorum out of the desire to be inclusive and serve. That boy’s mom really appreciated it as I am sure the boy did as well. You would often go out of your way to help those that seemed on the outskirts. You looked for those that needed a friend and Brant, you are a very loyal friend. This included kids younger than you, different than you, and anyone that you felt needed some extra love and attention.
A few days before your mission, Brant, you said we were going to go out somewhere, so I got all dressed and ready to go and we ended up driving out to the Salt River in your jeep! I was not dressed appropriately, and it was so hot, and I was so sweaty, but Brant, you loved the heat! You could stand the heat more than anyone I know. Being outdoors together was a nice way to say goodbye before your mission and it really summed up most of our childhood playtime.
After you were home from your church mission, you would sometimes pick up Kessa and me and you would take us places. One time we went swimming at Poston pool. We were there all afternoon. I think we all came home a little sun burnt.
Makessa remembers, when she was little, maybe 4 or 5, you used to take her out, she felt so loved and special; she always wanted a Jeep Cherokee because that’s what you drove back then. You always drove with the top down and he even let her stick her feet out the window.
She got to be the third wheel on many of your dates, through these adventures you made her feel like you were genuine friends, and now that she has a 4 year old of her own, she knows that’s a really special effort to make. That’s just the kind of guy you are, Brant. You made the extra effort to show her she was loved and important, and valuable. Kessa also thinks you are the baby whisperer, there were times you got Finn to settle down even when Kess couldn’t. Brant you always made her feel important and valued and heard.
Kids have always adore you Brant. You were so good at entertaining them and you would inevitably show them the hand game that we learned from Dad. You would squeeze around their wrist and push the blood out of the hand and then slowly release it and pull from the hand what felt like a string. We spent many a Sunday sitting in church taking turns pulling strings from our hands!
Kids were simply drawn to you; you understood their childlike natures. I remember one time I wanted to hang out with you, and I was going to get a sitter for my kids, and you said, “Why? Just ring them along.” You loved being surrounded by kids, especially your own.
Your nieces and nephews were no exception either. You loved to play with them and include them. They often were laughing at some silly thing you said or did.
Sage thinks you are so fun and easy to talk to. She remembers that one night at Grandpa and Grandma’s talking to them. They were all about 15 years old and were talking about dating and boys and kissing! Brant, you started to tell them what to do when they did not want to kiss a boy! You kept making funny faces and were acting like you were going to sneeze or throw up! You told them to act really grossed out and stick their tongues out in disgust at them! You had the all laughing so hard! Then Andrea started telling them that if a boy is walking them to the door after a date and they don’t want to kiss them, then pretend like they really needed to go to the bathroom and run inside before they have a chance! You had a great ability to make something lighthearted, even if it was a little embarrassing.
Brant, you felt like your birthday was kind of a raw deal, and it was hard to celebrate a birthday the day after Christmas. Remember the one year I asked you what you wanted for your birthday, and you told me you wanted a pair of nice shoes and because they were expensive, I gave you one on Christmas and one on your birthday? You did think it was funny!
Amber remembers when you would go to the sand dunes in CA with Jarel’s and Erick’s families. It was in the early 2000’s and Jarel and Amber had 2 young kids and Erick and JeniRae had two young ones also. It was after your mission but before you were married. The trips were fun, but always more fun with you. Amber was happy to hear when you were joining them on these trips and she knew that everyone else felt the same way. Brant, you liked to ride your dirt bike and you were young and brought energy, excitement and even entertainment. You were adventurous and fearless, it seemed. Sometimes that was a good thing. Other times, no so much. One particular time, everyone headed down to watch the races. Amber didn’t have anything to ride and you, being the kind and thoughtful person you were, decided to drive her in your truck to the races, which was a few dunes away. You jumped in and started heading that way, but the sand got softer and softer and your truck got slower and slower and eventually you were stuck. Amber doesn’t remember who found you both but there was no way that truck was getting out of the soft sand. Brant,, you had to leave your truck there overnight and wait for a tow truck the next morning, but it didn’t seem to get you down, you still enjoyed the dunes.
Amber thinks you are very thoughtful. An example of that was when you would text Amber on her birthday. She didn’t expect it, but it was so nice of you to remember in your busy schedule and take the time to do it. A birthday text from a sibling didn’t always happen every year, but Brant you somehow did it. Even when you were sick this year and it would be a few days before you passed, you texted your brother Jarel on his birthday. We didn’t even know you were sick at the time, so that text means even more now. Brant, you were a good example of someone who was caring, loving and thoughtful-all characteristics of Christ.
Side note: Brant, Erick and Jarel tell the story of you getting stuck in the sand, very differently, but you’ll have to ask them for their version, maybe you can figure out what really happened.
Brant, JeniRae is grateful that you offered to watch Alex while she ran some errands. She was an hour or so late in picking Alex up, but you took Alex shopping while she waited. Alex loved spending time with you.
Remember when Sam got her own shotgun when she was 16 years old? You had taken Sammy shooting several times before, but this time you took her out and showed her the ins and outs of her new gun.
Also, just before Sammy and CJ got engaged, Sammy was planning on serving a mission. She had driven over to where you worked to have her mission physical. When she finished, you took her out for lunch. You also recently treated her when she got Covid and was struggling to breath.
Jen was so grateful when you took her hiking with you a couple times-you knew she had the desire and passion but she admits she was nowhere near as fit as you were but you didn’t make her feel like it, you always hiked at the pace she needed to go.
Brant, you were always willing to walk with others, wherever they were at, and however they needed.
Remember last December when Michael’s car broke down? The engine would need to be replaced. He had a long drive to and from work and didn’t know what he was going to do. Brant, you found out Michael needed help and offered your old Toyota truck for Michael to drive while he waited the fate of his car. Michael and you talked about truck for a good long time. Brant, you were always looking out for everyone else.
Just a few months ago, you also noticed the office manager where you worked, had a flat tire on her car. Without telling anyone, you went and changed out the tire for her.
Leanna, who is on her mission right now, told me this story about you: “I remember when Brant taught me how to use a bow. Seven-year-old me thought it was the coolest thing ever. Right out of a fairytale or something. We were out with the bows that Papa was letting us use, shooting at old straw bales behind Papa’s garage. Brant, you were super patient, very methodically altering my form here and there, helping me find arrows that had gone far past the target, and gently encouraging me when I did manage to hit the straw. Brant, you helped me realize that something that was only a dream in my imagination could be a reality. That few minutes is probably half the reason I love archery so much now.
Brant, you also stopped by the night before I left on my mission to say goodbye. I was super nervous to leave, but you shared all sorts of fun stories from your mission, also in the Midwest. My favorite was when you and your companion were very lost, with nothing but miles upon miles of cornfields in sight. There was a man in an old truck on the side of the road, so you and your companion decided to ask for directions. The man rolled his eyes but grabbed a bucket out of the back of the truck and led you out into the cornfield. He told you to stand on the bucket. Brant, you did, and you were able to see just abo e the height of the corn. “Look way out there,” the man said. “What am I looking for?” “Way, way out there. Do you see it?” But all there was, was miles of corn. “See what?” “If you look hard enough, you’ll see the back of your own head.” We had a pretty good laugh about that. You gave me a journal after that and said to write “only the really special stuff” in it. I’ve kept it and have saved my most special mission miracles for it. Thank you. Brant.
I know the outdoor continued to be a blessing for you through the challenges you faced while in PA school. You would often go run camelback trail when school and life felt stressful. One night you got up to the top later than usual and you had to run down before it became too dark. You ran as fast as you could in order to beat the oncoming darkness of the even, and you told me that it got to the point where you could only see 1 or 2 steps in front of you. You told me you felt this was a metaphor for your life and an answer to prayer. You didn’t know what would happen in the future as you dealt with all your challenges with health and school, but you were okay with only seeing 1 or2 steps in front of you and you would manage alright. Thank you for your example of faith; it was your experience but you shared it for my benefit. You now get to see more steps in front of you, but I miss you as do so many others.
Brant, I know you love your family very much and when you love people you do it with an intense loyalty. When I was told of your passing, I said a prayer and asked Heavenly Father to tell you that I love you. The thought you sent immediately back came in your very Brant-like frankness, “Love my family.” It was a message directly from you; it is what you wanted us to know because that is part of who you are. Brant, I know you continue to love your family, you continue to take care of those you love even though it looks different, you are there. We wrote to each other throughout you mission and we always sign our letter with, “’til we meet again”. And so, we will send this last letter of love for our wonderful brother. We love you Brant, we miss you, God be with you ‘til we meet again!
