Bud Bourassa

To my father,

I know you didn't want a big "to do," so we honor that. You did not have a funeral, a wake, a memorial. But, man did you deserve the biggest gathering to celebrate the important life you lived. Your footprint was left on this world, your words left ringing in many people's thoughts, your jokes left igniting many people's smiles, your lessons left impacting many people's decisions, your coaching left influencing in many people's successes, and your humility left instilled in many people's hearts. This daughter continues to learn from you. I am forever impacted by the blessing and gift of being your daughter. Like one of your letters to me stated, "you have never been out of my mind or heart." Dad, you will never be out of my mind or heart.

I read through past letters. I hold onto past gifts. I look though the pictures I forced you to take. Yes, "me and my memories" Dad. I thank you for every one of these things.

Growing up, I did not understand the man that you are, as most children don't. If one is lucky, we grow to understand the true greatness of our parents. You were our magical Dad. You would come home after work with spackle on your jeans, and Nicky and I would argue over who got to peel that off your pants, not realizing why this was so important to us at that time. It was the simplicity of sitting with our hard working father. We would sit and watch anything with you, even if it meant being scared watching, "Tales from the Cript." I can hear you do the voice of one of the skits very clearly to this day! "It's Father's Day!"

You worked so hard, we knew that. You made so many special moments with us despite most likely being tired working as the best builder all day! Our home was filled with movie times, cribbage, poker, backgammon, watching sports, playing basketball, playing frisbee, going for ice cream, going for walks with our dog (your dog) "Askhim" (yes, that's his name), and enjoying Friday pizza nights (despite you hating pizza)!

Specifically, for me, I had a special bond of father and coach. As a little girl, you were my coach at home catching my pitches and throwing the ball back hard enough for me to learn! You knew what you were doing. I knew I had a special Dad. On the days that I went to your house after school, I would be able to attend your basketball practices. I thought you were famous! My father is "THE COACH." Then, later, you were my team's coach. The most special of times, always coaching to keep my head in the game and focused. I am capable...humble as you instilled…but capable.

Dad, some of the most special memories were when you would come onto the bus to give me food for the "away games." No father ever did that for their kids. It was you. I felt so loved, so important, so special. A seemingly simple gesture embedded in the greatest of love for his daughter. Then, you would get into the car and go to every away game. As the game started, I knew right where you were. Forever coaching me just by being there. I knew what to do. I felt you there. Periodically, throughout the game, I would quickly glance for the extra push and assurance. I see you in the stands as I write.

As the years progressed, life created physical distance in location, not in heart. In some of those years while I was working through life, you were unwavering in your love. No pressure. Watching me figure things out. Subtle words of wisdom for me to hear when I was ready. I believe you knew I would hear you. I apologize for the wait to see it all come together, Dad. But, I am so glad you did! Phil and I received the true gift of being able to enjoy days and nights with you in conversation and in the simplicity of silence. When Phil asked you how you were feeling near, which we didn't realize, was one of your last days, you stated that you were worried about your children. Phil assured you with his hand on your shoulder as I quietly watched from another room, “she will be ok,” Dad, I will forever live like you wished for, in humbleness, in laughter, in responsibility, in peace, in happiness, and in love. I have our tree out front of our house watching over our new home, a gift that I know is from you. You loved our big tree at our wedding! A message from you. You showed us that this is our perfect home.

Of course I could write a book, but I will take a page from your book and say at this time, sometimes less is more. I look forward to going home to NH after many years. I will see special places that are filled with memories. I will be surrounded by buildings and homes that you literally built with your hands. Your mark forever left. I will be able to share this with my husband. I know I will run into many who are missing you. This will be a connection that you have created. A forever gift to many. I may even sit on the bench at the Mobil and have coffee (or a hot chocolate)!

I miss you.

I love you.

Love Ya, See Ya...

Darcy