Catherine Hare

Dennis HareThere is no way to express all of the words and feelings that we want to regarding our mom. The only way we could think to honor mom is to write a love letter to her. Dear Mom, They say that life is not measured by the number of breaths we take but by the moments that take our breath away. Well, mom, you had so many of those moments, and you gave so many more to all of us. While for us, they weren’t enough. We embrace the moments that we had with you and the incredible memories that were created. You held so many roles on this earth. And unlike so many of us, you always knew the value of each role and played it to your fullest—you stayed present and in the moment at all times. You embraced each of your roles and left lasting impressions on all as you touched us. Your adventure on this earth became long before us. Your core was formed by your loving family with Grandma, Grandpa, Sandy, Linda, JoAnn, Diana, and aunt Edy, among others. We cherish the memories that you told us of your childhood and the crazy adventures that you had growing up as a group of five girls. Despite moving away from Cincinnati and away from your sisters, you continued to work to maintain a strong bond with them. You loved talking with each of them and reporting back to us what was going on for each of them and their families. As sisters, there is no bond stronger than the three of us. You modeled the importance of that to us with your sisters. No fight was ever worth losing that relationship. Although it drove us crazy how much you would avoid conflict. Whenever we raised a topic that you knew could add to conflict, you always said “ok I am not going to talk about that now. I will talk to you later” or “I love you but I don’t like you right now”. Now, we get it. There is nothing more important than the relationships that get us through this life. And we will build each other up and support each others’ choices even if we don’t agree because nothing will tear us apart. Your journey towards our family began when you met dad. God knew what He was doing when he put you both in that UDF to meet. Although you didn’t date then, your loving and beautiful relationship began then. Your wedding day was amazing and highlighted that you and dad were built to withstand the storms together. Although it poured, the power went out at church, and you had to delay the mass, you and dad decided power or not, you were getting married. In that moment, the lights came on because together you are the light, and together, you could conquer the world. You and dad taught us so much about having a lasting marriage that makes it through thick and thin—you constantly worked on it and gave grace to each other. You didn’t point out the other’s flaws. We knew, everyone who met you knew, that Dad was your everything—Your time away with dad was precious and you spent that time together. It didn’t matter if it was vacation or for dad’s work, you just wanted to be with him. Although you couldn’t do that when we were younger because you gave so much to us, you kept that strong light together and you were able to enjoy the fruit of that work as we got older. We knew that your trips to the Smokey Mountains were a priority. Every trip, we would get a text or a call saying something like “dad and I are going into the mountains to have our picnic lunch. We don’t get much cell reception there so you won’t be able to reach us. We’ll call you later. Love you.” Dad would send us pictures of the trip as your trip progressed and we loved seeing your smiling faces together. You were Dad’s angel here on this earth…you saved both of your lives grabbing that steering wheel when you were coming back from your annual trip to Cincinnati to decorate your parents’ graves and dad passed out at the wheel. Because of you, you saved Dad and you. And now, you are Dad’s guardian angel to watch over him. We will do what we can here, but we still need you to help watch him and we know you will. As a wife, we learn from you and will work for our marriages and give grace to our husbands As daughters, we will continue to love dad and embrace the quiet time—just talking and sharing memories. We know that you would filter our stories a bit before when you told dad and now he will get the full, unfiltered pieces. Wonder how many times we will get that look from him or make his face turn bright red. As a mom, there is not another better mother in the world. There are no words to express everything you mean to us. We know that moving away from your family in Cincinnati was one of the hardest things you and dad did, but it made us 5 so strong together. Although we moved many times, you made each house into a home. You focused on the right schools and churches for us and were so active in all of those for us. The hours that we spent at St Brigid after school as you worked on the religious education program showed us your love for the church and having the strong values that we have. Even when you moved to Cleveland with Dad and Kim while Amy and I remained in Columbus for college, you checked out apartments with us to find the perfect one where you felt safe leaving us. But you also made the house in Strongsville feel like home for us. We had rooms of our own…even Aaron had the finished basement as his room when we came home. I loved having placed my orders for the meals with you before we drove up 71 to visit, and Amy always wondering why my favorite meals were always cooked. You were a true advocate and cheerleader for us. I will never forget how mad you were, when Amy and I were in college, and you had a meeting with the administrators at school for Kim. Someone in the meeting said maybe college wasn’t in Kim’s future. I could feel the anger you had through your voice as you told Amy and me about that on the phone—no one was going to tell your child that they couldn’t do and be whatever they wanted to be. You were passionate about our dreams as if they were your own. I wanted to be a lawyer and you were my champion every day through law school. When Kim was determined to get a tattoo, you decided that you would go with her to make sure it was safe for her. Although dad did not agree with that as evident when he called Kim and she told him that she was getting a tattoo and he said he would talk to mom…Kim promptly responded, she is right here. You knew that she was going to do it whether you and Dad agreed with it so you were there for Kim…honoring her choice. When Amy and Brian had to move after they got married, you knew what it was like having to move away from your family…and you supported them whole heartedly even though we all knew that you didn’t want it. But you and Dad were determined to support them and stay actively involved as you always have…sending gifts in the mail and visiting them. Even conspiring with Jack on some of your adventures together. Although you are always our cheerleader, we knew that dad was your number 1. I remember when I was working a few years ago in one of my crazy days, you called me just to talk. I asked you: “why don’t you call dad”? I remember your response so vividly when you said “because you’re dad is working; he is busy.” I laughed because although I was a grown adult with children and a hectic work schedule, it is clear that I am still your child and my schedule can never be as busy as dad’s. Family time was imperative at our house—you made sure to provide us with memories of annual family vacations and trips to Cincinnati to visit with family. None of us will forget our trip to Hawaii or when we went to Tijuana and I had some nasty stuff fall out of the sky on my face. As moms, we will take our lessons from you…we will have our combat gear on to fight for our kids but most importantly we will lead with love and remind them that we will love them whatever paths they choose in life. We will always be there for them cheering them on from the sidelines just as you were there when we were growing up and as you have done as Gram. You allowed each of us to make our own choices. As we each married, you embraced our spouses. Aaron, Brian, and Craig were not just sons in laws to you, they became your sons in every way. Which meant that sometimes you even advocated for them if you felt that one of us girls was being a little too hard on our spouse. As future in-laws, we will embrace our children’s choice of a life partner and respect them. We will love them and include them in our families. We all know that your most cherished and recent role was being Gram--as it meant you had accomplished so much in your journey. They say “grandkids are the greatest gift your heart will ever know.” There is no doubt that this was your motto with your babies: Colter, Lily, Gia, Jack and Ella. You have a strong and special relationship with each of them. Amy, Kim and I truly aspire to be like you as moms. But you were here to pick up our pieces still and you did so without any complaining. Unlike so many, you weren’t just involved in the good stuff, you were here for everything…watching the kids for a bit so we could get rest when they were little, helping with homework, driving kids to various activities. I wanted and needed you with me as I gave birth to Colter and Lily, and you beamed when I asked you to be with Aaron and me for my delivery. Colter or as you call him “My Colter” was the first. We all knew that you were the first to hold him—and an everlasting bond was formed in that moment. You support Colter through thick and thin…the hours that you sat helping or sometimes trying to help him get his outstanding work done for school. You spent several late nights helping him with projects or studying. In addition to school work, you created a bond with him and embraced his passions even before I did. Because he enjoyed playing the piano on a trip we took, you and Pappy showed up with a beautiful keyboard set for him as an early Christmas present for him. Last year, you heard that he wanted a long board…so of course, you ordered one for him and happily gave it to him again as an early Christmas gift. You loved watching him blossom in marching band and were so proud when you heard he was a section leader for his senior year. Lily and you are old souls together—you are like Thelma and Louise. The two of you could talk forever together. Lily loved hearing about any and all family drama from you. She always knew when you were upset with Pappy or one of us as you confided in her. You were over in a heartbeat to help Lily when I couldn’t—even if that meant just sitting with her and telling me to get away. All Lily had to do was let you know that she needed some new clothes, and the two of you were off to Old Navy or a plethora of other stores. You loved watching Lily cheer on Friday nights especially seeing Ella cheering on in the stands as Lily was cheering on the field, and we all knew how much you loved her homemade focaccia bread. Just as you were there when Colter and Lily were born, you were there when we came home from China with Gia. You worked to make it as easy as possible for me to be gone from the twins for those two weeks. You and dad stayed with Colter & Lily at our house and we skyped every night. Although I was frustrated with you at times—because I had wrapped a present for Colter and Lily to open each day, but in true form, you couldn’t hold back…once they saw the gifts, you decided they couldn’t wait and let them open all of the presents at one time. You helped with every one of Gia’s surgeries…and made sure she had plenty of coloring books, crafts and ice cream during recoveries. You were so proud when Gia became part of the marching band as an 8th grader. You beamed watching all 3 of them on the field last fall, and we loved yelling as Colter & Gia performed at competitions with the band. You made sure Dad and you were at my house when we couldn’t travel to Indy last year but we could watch it on the TV together. We yelled and cheered at that TV as if they could hear us. Despite being states away from Amy and Brian when Amy gave birth to Jack, nothing was going to stop you from being there as you had been there for Colter, Lily and Gia. You were ready to and anxious to be there for Jack’s birth. We didn’t know if he would arrive before Christmas, but you were determined to have gifts ready that Christmas for him just in case. And as soon as you knew, you were in the car with dad to be there for Jack’s birth. You loved visiting with Jack—hearing about his school and his activities. Riding in the golf cart or picking up “hot” golf balls to do crafts. Three years after Jack’s birth, you had the blessing of your youngest baby, Ella Catherine. As with all of the others, you were there for Kim. Your face beamed with joy to see Ella. You loved sitting and watching Ella play out front of your house—you would sit forever as she played. As Ella started school, you loved picking her up and always made sure that you were there even 30 minutes early so you would be in front of the line when E got out of school. You would just read your book or talk to Lily as you waited for Ella. You created a special bond with each of the grandkids. You respect their individuality. As future grandparents, we will remember your relationships with Colter, Lily, Gia, Jack and Ella. We know you worked hard—being there even when you were exhausted, going from one house to the other to help with homework or just listening to them, driving to Mississippi to spend time with Jack, or going through the phone calling each of them every day…but this was important to you. Each of the grandkids whole-heartedly knows that there was no judgment in your eyes with them…it didn’t matter what they did, Gram loves them and would help them walk through fire. We will work tirelessly to be that way not only for your babies, but for our future grandkids. We know that we were your rainbow in life, but your grandchildren are your pot of gold. Mom, you beamed with love talking about your 5 babies. Although your babies may not see you every day now, rest assured that they know in their hearts that you love them every day. We know that you have a new role in their lives as their guardian angel, and you will continue to guide them as they grow, but you will forever be their Gram! Even this week, you are teaching us. As dad and us girls went to church this past Sunday, the gospel was all about your life teachings to us and how we are presented with opportunities in life and we have to choose the path we go down. The easy path and most obvious one is only thinking of yourself. But there are other paths that we can choose to take where we can show gratefulness and compassion. Always be mindful of your choices as those paths will make us and show everyone what is important to us. You preached this all the time to us, and we now understand it. You didn’t care what the world thought. You did it your way. In the end, you did it your way, you left when you wanted as you didn’t want to ever be a burden to us. Your wings were ready for you, but our hearts are not. Our time with you will never be enough for us, and you could never be a burden to us. Mom, go rest high on that mountain, your work on earth is done and we got this. You deserve some rest. Although we will never fill the void that we have in our hearts, we promise to love and lead with love and grace as you did to support us, dad, our husbands, and your grandbabies: Colter, Lily, Gia, Jack and Ella, through this life. We love you forever, and you will continue to live through us…we will take each breath and each step in your honor. We are so proud to be your daughters and your legacy! Mom, we love you and you will always be in our hearts! Love you forever! Love, Your loving daughters…this is not goodbye…talk to you later, mom. There is no way to express all of the words and feelings that we want to regarding our mom. The only way we could think to honor mom is to write a love letter to her. Dear Mom, They say that life is not measured by the number of breaths we take but by the moments that take our breath away. Well, mom, you had so many of those moments, and you gave so many more to all of us. While for us, they weren’t enough. We embrace the moments that we had with you and the incredible memories that were created. You held so many roles on this earth. And unlike so many of us, you always knew the value of each role and played it to your fullest—you stayed present and in the moment at all times. You embraced each of your roles and left lasting impressions on all as you touched us. Your adventure on this earth became long before us. Your core was formed by your loving family with Grandma, Grandpa, Sandy, Linda, JoAnn, Diana, and aunt Edy, among others. We cherish the memories that you told us of your childhood and the crazy adventures that you had growing up as a group of five girls. Despite moving away from Cincinnati and away from your sisters, you continued to work to maintain a strong bond with them. You loved talking with each of them and reporting back to us what was going on for each of them and their families. As sisters, there is no bond stronger than the three of us. You modeled the importance of that to us with your sisters. No fight was ever worth losing that relationship. Although it drove us crazy how much you would avoid conflict. Whenever we raised a topic that you knew could add to conflict, you always said “ok I am not going to talk about that now. I will talk to you later” or “I love you but I don’t like you right now”. Now, we get it. There is nothing more important than the relationships that get us through this life. And we will build each other up and support each others’ choices even if we don’t agree because nothing will tear us apart. Your journey towards our family began when you met dad. God knew what He was doing when he put you both in that UDF to meet. Although you didn’t date then, your loving and beautiful relationship began then. Your wedding day was amazing and highlighted that you and dad were built to withstand the storms together. Although it poured, the power went out at church, and you had to delay the mass, you and dad decided power or not, you were getting married. In that moment, the lights came on because together you are the light, and together, you could conquer the world. You and dad taught us so much about having a lasting marriage that makes it through thick and thin—you constantly worked on it and gave grace to each other. You didn’t point out the other’s flaws. We knew, everyone who met you knew, that Dad was your everything—Your time away with dad was precious and you spent that time together. It didn’t matter if it was vacation or for dad’s work, you just wanted to be with him. Although you couldn’t do that when we were younger because you gave so much to us, you kept that strong light together and you were able to enjoy the fruit of that work as we got older. We knew that your trips to the Smokey Mountains were a priority. Every trip, we would get a text or a call saying something like “dad and I are going into the mountains to have our picnic lunch. We don’t get much cell reception there so you won’t be able to reach us. We’ll call you later. Love you.” Dad would send us pictures of the trip as your trip progressed and we loved seeing your smiling faces together. You were Dad’s angel here on this earth…you saved both of your lives grabbing that steering wheel when you were coming back from your annual trip to Cincinnati to decorate your parents’ graves and dad passed out at the wheel. Because of you, you saved Dad and you. And now, you are Dad’s guardian angel to watch over him. We will do what we can here, but we still need you to help watch him and we know you will. As a wife, we learn from you and will work for our marriages and give grace to our husbands As daughters, we will continue to love dad and embrace the quiet time—just talking and sharing memories. We know that you would filter our stories a bit before when you told dad and now he will get the full, unfiltered pieces. Wonder how many times we will get that look from him or make his face turn bright red. As a mom, there is not another better mother in the world. There are no words to express everything you mean to us. We know that moving away from your family in Cincinnati was one of the hardest things you and dad did, but it made us 5 so strong together. Although we moved many times, you made each house into a home. You focused on the right schools and churches for us and were so active in all of those for us. The hours that we spent at St Brigid after school as you worked on the religious education program showed us your love for the church and having the strong values that we have. Even when you moved to Cleveland with Dad and Kim while Amy and I remained in Columbus for college, you checked out apartments with us to find the perfect one where you felt safe leaving us. But you also made the house in Strongsville feel like home for us. We had rooms of our own…even Aaron had the finished basement as his room when we came home. I loved having placed my orders for the meals with you before we drove up 71 to visit, and Amy always wondering why my favorite meals were always cooked. You were a true advocate and cheerleader for us. I will never forget how mad you were, when Amy and I were in college, and you had a meeting with the administrators at school for Kim. Someone in the meeting said maybe college wasn’t in Kim’s future. I could feel the anger you had through your voice as you told Amy and me about that on the phone—no one was going to tell your child that they couldn’t do and be whatever they wanted to be. You were passionate about our dreams as if they were your own. I wanted to be a lawyer and you were my champion every day through law school. When Kim was determined to get a tattoo, you decided that you would go with her to make sure it was safe for her. Although dad did not agree with that as evident when he called Kim and she told him that she was getting a tattoo and he said he would talk to mom…Kim promptly responded, she is right here. You knew that she was going to do it whether you and Dad agreed with it so you were there for Kim…honoring her choice. When Amy and Brian had to move after they got married, you knew what it was like having to move away from your family…and you supported them whole heartedly even though we all knew that you didn’t want it. But you and Dad were determined to support them and stay actively involved as you always have…sending gifts in the mail and visiting them. Even conspiring with Jack on some of your adventures together. Although you are always our cheerleader, we knew that dad was your number 1. I remember when I was working a few years ago in one of my crazy days, you called me just to talk. I asked you: “why don’t you call dad”? I remember your response so vividly when you said “because you’re dad is working; he is busy.” I laughed because although I was a grown adult with children and a hectic work schedule, it is clear that I am still your child and my schedule can never be as busy as dad’s. Family time was imperative at our house—you made sure to provide us with memories of annual family vacations and trips to Cincinnati to visit with family. None of us will forget our trip to Hawaii or when we went to Tijuana and I had some nasty stuff fall out of the sky on my face. As moms, we will take our lessons from you…we will have our combat gear on to fight for our kids but most importantly we will lead with love and remind them that we will love them whatever paths they choose in life. We will always be there for them cheering them on from the sidelines just as you were there when we were growing up and as you have done as Gram. You allowed each of us to make our own choices. As we each married, you embraced our spouses. Aaron, Brian, and Craig were not just sons in laws to you, they became your sons in every way. Which meant that sometimes you even advocated for them if you felt that one of us girls was being a little too hard on our spouse. As future in-laws, we will embrace our children’s choice of a life partner and respect them. We will love them and include them in our families. We all know that your most cherished and recent role was being Gram--as it meant you had accomplished so much in your journey. They say “grandkids are the greatest gift your heart will ever know.” There is no doubt that this was your motto with your babies: Colter, Lily, Gia, Jack and Ella. You have a strong and special relationship with each of them. Amy, Kim and I truly aspire to be like you as moms. But you were here to pick up our pieces still and you did so without any complaining. Unlike so many, you weren’t just involved in the good stuff, you were here for everything…watching the kids for a bit so we could get rest when they were little, helping with homework, driving kids to various activities. I wanted and needed you with me as I gave birth to Colter and Lily, and you beamed when I asked you to be with Aaron and me for my delivery. Colter or as you call him “My Colter” was the first. We all knew that you were the first to hold him—and an everlasting bond was formed in that moment. You support Colter through thick and thin…the hours that you sat helping or sometimes trying to help him get his outstanding work done for school. You spent several late nights helping him with projects or studying. In addition to school work, you created a bond with him and embraced his passions even before I did. Because he enjoyed playing the piano on a trip we took, you and Pappy showed up with a beautiful keyboard set for him as an early Christmas present for him. Last year, you heard that he wanted a long board…so of course, you ordered one for him and happily gave it to him again as an early Christmas gift. You loved watching him blossom in marching band and were so proud when you heard he was a section leader for his senior year. Lily and you are old souls together—you are like Thelma and Louise. The two of you could talk forever together. Lily loved hearing about any and all family drama from you. She always knew when you were upset with Pappy or one of us as you confided in her. You were over in a heartbeat to help Lily when I couldn’t—even if that meant just sitting with her and telling me to get away. All Lily had to do was let you know that she needed some new clothes, and the two of you were off to Old Navy or a plethora of other stores. You loved watching Lily cheer on Friday nights especially seeing Ella cheering on in the stands as Lily was cheering on the field, and we all knew how much you loved her homemade focaccia bread. Just as you were there when Colter and Lily were born, you were there when we came home from China with Gia. You worked to make it as easy as possible for me to be gone from the twins for those two weeks. You and dad stayed with Colter & Lily at our house and we skyped every night. Although I was frustrated with you at times—because I had wrapped a present for Colter and Lily to open each day, but in true form, you couldn’t hold back…once they saw the gifts, you decided they couldn’t wait and let them open all of the presents at one time. You helped with every one of Gia’s surgeries…and made sure she had plenty of coloring books, crafts and ice cream during recoveries. You were so proud when Gia became part of the marching band as an 8th grader. You beamed watching all 3 of them on the field last fall, and we loved yelling as Colter & Gia performed at competitions with the band. You made sure Dad and you were at my house when we couldn’t travel to Indy last year but we could watch it on the TV together. We yelled and cheered at that TV as if they could hear us. Despite being states away from Amy and Brian when Amy gave birth to Jack, nothing was going to stop you from being there as you had been there for Colter, Lily and Gia. You were ready to and anxious to be there for Jack’s birth. We didn’t know if he would arrive before Christmas, but you were determined to have gifts ready that Christmas for him just in case. And as soon as you knew, you were in the car with dad to be there for Jack’s birth. You loved visiting with Jack—hearing about his school and his activities. Riding in the golf cart or picking up “hot” golf balls to do crafts. Three years after Jack’s birth, you had the blessing of your youngest baby, Ella Catherine. As with all of the others, you were there for Kim. Your face beamed with joy to see Ella. You loved sitting and watching Ella play out front of your house—you would sit forever as she played. As Ella started school, you loved picking her up and always made sure that you were there even 30 minutes early so you would be in front of the line when E got out of school. You would just read your book or talk to Lily as you waited for Ella. You created a special bond with each of the grandkids. You respect their individuality. As future grandparents, we will remember your relationships with Colter, Lily, Gia, Jack and Ella. We know you worked hard—being there even when you were exhausted, going from one house to the other to help with homework or just listening to them, driving to Mississippi to spend time with Jack, or going through the phone calling each of them every day…but this was important to you. Each of the grandkids whole-heartedly knows that there was no judgment in your eyes with them…it didn’t matter what they did, Gram loves them and would help them walk through fire. We will work tirelessly to be that way not only for your babies, but for our future grandkids. We know that we were your rainbow in life, but your grandchildren are your pot of gold. Mom, you beamed with love talking about your 5 babies. Although your babies may not see you every day now, rest assured that they know in their hearts that you love them every day. We know that you have a new role in their lives as their guardian angel, and you will continue to guide them as they grow, but you will forever be their Gram! Even this week, you are teaching us. As dad and us girls went to church this past Sunday, the gospel was all about your life teachings to us and how we are presented with opportunities in life and we have to choose the path we go down. The easy path and most obvious one is only thinking of yourself. But there are other paths that we can choose to take where we can show gratefulness and compassion. Always be mindful of your choices as those paths will make us and show everyone what is important to us. You preached this all the time to us, and we now understand it. You didn’t care what the world thought. You did it your way. In the end, you did it your way, you left when you wanted as you didn’t want to ever be a burden to us. Your wings were ready for you, but our hearts are not. Our time with you will never be enough for us, and you could never be a burden to us. Mom, go rest high on that mountain, your work on earth is done and we got this. You deserve some rest. Although we will never fill the void that we have in our hearts, we promise to love and lead with love and grace as you did to support us, dad, our husbands, and your grandbabies: Colter, Lily, Gia, Jack and Ella, through this life. We love you forever, and you will continue to live through us…we will take each breath and each step in your honor. We are so proud to be your daughters and your legacy! Mom, we love you and you will always be in our hearts! Love you forever! Love, Your loving daughters…this is not goodbye…talk to you later, mom.