Carol was an amazing person. She was funny, thoughtful & compassionate. She also accomplished quite a bit to help those in need in her short time with us. Feel free to read her obituary for more interesting information on Carol. Rather than elaborating on her obituary, I’d like to use this space to tell you how I saw Carol and what she meant to me.
Carol was born & raised in New York. Although my family lived next door when I was real young, I didn’t get a chance to really get to know Carol until I was a teenager & started dating her son, Kenny. I was 17 at the time & spent a great deal of my free time at her house. She had been injured on the job & was no longer able to work by this time. Kenny would be out working & I would be at his house hanging out with Carol. We spent countless hours hanging out in the living room talking & watching episodes of whatever TV show was on at the moment. She was always there regardless of whether it was to celebrate a new job, cry about an argument I had with her son or to rant & rave about whatever might be irritating me at the moment. She was always there.
Carol had one of the biggest hearts of anyone I know. The front door of her home was always swinging open with another friend or kids from the neighborhood popping by. Carol had two sons, Kenny & Patrick whom she raised in the same house she was raised in. Right here in Kingston on Downs. While the boys were growing up everyone knew that Carol’s house was a safe space. You need someone to talk to, Carol was there. You were hungry, while she didn’t have much she would still make sure you got something to eat. Her entire life was dedicated to helping others. But don’t mistake her kindness for weakness because I definitely heard stories of Carol calling the cops & times where she yelled & kicked everyone out of the house.
After she raised her own two children, she chose to take custody of her granddaughter, Amanda & dedicated her life to raising her. It wasn’t easy, but Carol never gave up. She never gave up on anyone. She was always there. As with most young loves, Kenny & I went our separate ways. I never stopped loving him & wasn’t ready to give up the relationship I had built with Carol. I moved on, got pregnant & moved to AZ but I still kept in contact with Carol. I’d call to check in & catch up. Since Carol was the safe space she also had all the information on what was going on in the neighborhood. I could call & get caught up like I still lived across town. Every time I flew back to NY from AZ, I’d pop over & spend time with her & Amanda. My son, Tyler & Amanda are only 5 maybe 6 years apart in age. It was surreal watching them each year as they grew older.
As fate would have it, I ended up moving back to NY after securing a job in Albany. Before I started my new job & on the weekends I’d drive down to pick Carol up for lunch or dinner & it would be like I had never been gone. “Hi honey” she’d say. Or “I love ya, dear”. Fast forward a little bit, the paths that Kenny & I were on crossed. Same comfortable, safe feeling as if time never passed. We started dating again. Fast forward a few years and I’m right back full circle to spending Saturday afternoons at Carols watching re-run episodes of Law & Order SVU & drinking coffee. Life is funny like that sometimes.
I always knew that Carol was not in the best of health but nothing (and I mean nothing) prepared me for losing her this early. Her passing rocked me to my very core! I don’t think she knew how much of an impact that she had on so many people.
I hope she’s up there right now reading this as I type. I miss you Carol, more than you could even fathom. I hope you are having a good time up there. Please tell Cindy, Janice & my grandmother that we miss them too.
Things are so different & yet the same. It’s no longer weird to come into the house & not see you sitting in your chair, but it’s incredibly sad when I think about you not being here for the holidays or birthdays. I know you knew. I wish I knew at the time, but I didn’t, so for now I’m comforted by the memories & the stories that continue to be told. I love you, I miss you & I wish you’d come visit more often. I heard your bells the other night. ♥️♥️
We little knew the day,
God was going to call your name.
In life we loved you dearly,
In death we do the same.
It broke our hearts to lose you,
But you didn’t go alone.
For part of us went with you,
The day God called you home.
You left us peaceful memories,
Your love is still our guide.
And though we cannot see you,
You are always at our side.
Our family chain is broken,
And nothing seems the same.
But as God calls us one by one,
The chain will link again.
I really miss you Carol, everyday I miss you. P.S. tell Cindy, Janice & my grandma that they are deeply missed too! ♥️
