Lillian Ross Lauer (1930-2024) Obituary and Memorial

Life story

Lillian Ross Lauer passed away peacefully on January 20 at the age of 93, amidst her loving family and close friends. Lilly was the second oldest in what was to become a family of 10 children. The wonderful memories she had of growing up in Ashland Pa. with her beloved 4 brothers and 5 sisters sustained her till her end of days. Lilly and her sister Isabelle were 6 and 5 years old when their father, Tom Ross (former band leader and choir director at St. Joes in Ashland) coached them to perform Silent Night – soprano and alto, at Christmas Eve Midnight mass for the congregation. That was the beginning of a joyful mindset that Lilly thrived under until very recently. There was always music in their home. In the following years, with tight three-part harmonies, Lilly, Hellen Marie and Isabel were The Ross Sisters, performing semi-professionally on local radio through their late teens and early twenties until a handsome young Jack Lauer came along and caught her attention. At a little ice cream parlor called Candyland in their home town, there was a juke box. It was there that Lilly and Jack danced their way into each other’s hearts and remained quite the Fred and Ginger for nearly 60 years.

Lilly studied voice and enjoyed singing soprano in many light operas with the Brandywine Singers while they lived in Delaware (performing at Longwood Gardens) and then again later with Felix Molzer here at the Count Basie Theater after moving to Fair Haven. She also sang with the Monmouth Civic Chorus and the Nativity Choir in Fair Haven. A devout Catholic, Lilly cantered in that church for over 40 years. She just loved to sing and it wasn’t hard to coax perfect harmonies out of her until the very end.

Lilly became a master at everything she did. Along with her gifted and renowned singing voice, she was an accomplished seamstress (who made most of her own clothes beginning at the age of 12), artist, gourmet cook, and gardener. She started wall papering with her friend Joan, which morphed into a successful business installing decorative moldings and paneling. Nothing could stop her. Two story foyers that required perilous scaffolding she took in stride. Her dear friend Nancy tells a story about lamenting the condition of her beloved old piano to which mom replied… so let’s refinish it… and they did! Each birthday for her extended family was accompanied by a remarkably decorated and delicious cake. Every grandchild has their own quilt made especially for them. She lived by and was a prime example of the motto

“There is nothing you can’t do if you put your mind to it.”

Lilly was truly, innately elegant, gracious, warm, loving, giving and uber talented with an underlying confidence and determination that fueled everything she did. She was a force, and she had the very best French twist ever.

She adored her family and was so grateful for and lovingly involved in the lives of her 3 children; Kris Murphy (David), John Lauer (Kim) and Beth Drummond (John), 6 grandchildren, Sarah Kiley (JB), Emily Billington (George), Wilson McDermott (Sean), Jack, Scott (Jess) and Abby Drummond and her 9 great grandchildren – Gavin, James and Owen Kiley, Henry, Casper and Eve Billington, and Rhys, Flynn and Stevie McDermott.

Memorial Mass will be held on Friday, January 26th at 11 am at Church of the Nativity, 180 Ridge Rd, Fair Haven, NJ 07704. Arrangements are under the direction of Thompson Memorial Home of Red Bank, NJ. In lieu of flowers, please consider donating to VNA Health Group: https://vnahg.org/memorial-gifts-and-gifts-in-honor/

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